Open up. Tell your crush more about yourself: your dreams, wishes, and sorrows. It’s possible for love to grow where there previously wasn’t any, but they have to think of you as a person with real goals, successes, and problems instead of just a friend. The more they’re able to see parts of you that others don’t see, the better off you’ll be. [1] X Research source Make the person feel special. Let them know that they are someone’s friend—your friend—and that you value them in a unique way. [2] X Expert Source Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSWPsychotherapist Expert Interview. 11 June 2020. Compliment them for their company and for being there when you needed them, times when you felt sad and all alone. Show appreciation for the comfort the person offers you and for making you smile. Always dream with them, build with them, cheer them on, and encourage them. [3] X Research source

This is very tough to do with words, because you don’t want to make them think you’re friends just in order to get in a relationship. In the beginning, stick to flirting with your body. Don’t pass up that chance to sit shoulder-to-shoulder with them or brush your hand against theirs. Look them in the eye, and smile a lot. [5] X Research source Gradually move on to flirting with words. Tell her how much you admire her. Tell her how special she is to you. Tell her she makes your day easier to get through. But remember, a little hinting goes a long, long way! If you’re gushing to her every twenty minutes, she could begin to feel uncomfortable as friends and start to distance herself from you. [6] X Research source

Get your crush one-on-one. This one’s important. If you never see them when it’s just the two of you, work toward that goal. The trick is to make it not look like a date when you ask them, but feel like a date when they get there. For instance, you might say you’re in Starbucks studying and you want an awesome friend to distract you from your work instead of “Hey, do you wanna get coffee later on, just you and me?” Make them a mix-tape of your favorite music. The music you listen to can show a whole other side of you, so it’s a great way to help your crush understand you better. It also sends her a subtle message that you enjoy sharing personal things with her. Be sure to include music that you think she might like. You could be setting yourself up for a fall if she only listens to Beethoven and you give her Metallica. After you give her your mix, ask her to make one for you.

When you’re sure that you are getting somewhere, back off a little. If you see them everyday, avoid them for two days or so, no contact! They might just end up missing you and really understanding how deeply they feel for you. But make sure you have a valid reason for being away when they ask—you don’t want to be caught in a lie, or look like you’re avoiding them on purpose.

Be persistent and continue to do fun things with them. Studies show that doing something exciting, daring, or adventurous together helps both of your brains release a chemical (called norepinephrine) that is associated with romantic feelings. Try going to Six Flags, that haunted house, or an exciting game — anything that might cause the two of you to jump, scream, or wriggle with excitement.

If you are sure, you need to tell them. Be honest and explain your feelings. You can say something like: “I’ve really valued our friendship these past couple months, and have grown to see how special of a person you are, and how alive you make me feel inside. I value our friendship over everything, but I really like you. I can’t hide my feelings for you anymore. Would you go on a date with me?"[10] X Expert Source Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSWPsychotherapist Expert Interview. 11 June 2020. Give them an out. Let them know that it’s okay if they don’t feel the same way, and that you can take it. You want their honest opinion, not a sugarcoated idea of what you want them to say. Try saying, “I know you may not feel the same way about me, and I respect that. " It could go a long way to saving the friendship if they don’t want to pursue a relationship. And if they do like you back, it will reinforce how sweet and respectful you are.

Remember, if they’re not interested in dating you, it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you—it means the two of you aren’t right for each other. Take some time for yourself if you need to.